Nothing in life makes the heart ache nearly as much as when someone who we love so much passes away, leaving us behind to make sense of that loss. Struggling and coping with death is one of the most challenging aspects of the human experience, and it is something that we never really fully understand how to do. Death, by its very nature, is a hard things to wrap our minds around.
This challenging time can be especially difficult if we’re also recovering from addiction. Additional stresses and depression can make us susceptible to relapse. But it doesn’t have to be that way. There are definitely positive things that you can do to help you cope with the loss of the a loved one in a healing way…
Mourn with other people
After we lose somebody close to us, it is natural to want to be alone. Indeed, it is actually very good to get some alone time to get a wrap on our thoughts and emotions. This sort of reflection is very important to the grieving process. However, it is also important to not do everything alone in the mourning process. Mourning with other people and sharing in the emotional loss is an equally important experience that should be engaged with. Shutting yourself out from the other people who share in this loss can make the grieving process convoluted and more difficult.
Don’t hold back emotions
Holding back your emotions and trying to keep a calm and neutral presence is something that a lot of people try to do. While there’s nothing wrong with grieving in a quieter way, make sure that you don’t bury your true feelings. Being emotionally dishonest with yourself and other loved ones makes it difficult to find connection with other people in this period of grieving. Also, crying is an important way to work through emotions and let out any pain you feel on the inside.
Just talk. Don’t force it, and don’t feel like you can’t have your quiet moments, but it’s important to talk and share your feelings after losing somebody close to you. It’s in times of conversation after a loss that people tend to come together and connect. Connection is one of the most important ways that we deal with losing somebody that we love. Sharing stories and talking about memories with that person is a wonderful way to bring everyone together.
Be around nature
Sometimes our modern life is not the best place to work through the emotions that we have after somebody close to us passes away. It’s hard to feel a connection with the deceased, at times, in a world that is filled to the brim with technology and distractions. For this reason, it can be very helpful to get away from these distractions and head out to be in nature. Being in nature can reduce stress and anxiety, and puts things into perspective after someone has passed away.
Celebrate their life
This one has been said so much that it is practically a cliche, but the rituals and events that happen after somebody dies should be about the celebration of the life they lived, rather than dwelling too much on their recent death. This is probably the hardest of these tips to follow, as the hole that people can leave in our lives are hard to get over and ignore, especially at their own funeral. However, the person who left us behind would definitely want us to remember them as the full-of-life person that we loved while they were alive, rather than be entirely consumed by sadness in their memory.
Get support, if you need it
Grief hits some people harder than others. If you just can’t find ways to cope in a positive way, then maybe it’s time to accept that you need to find help for yourself. There is no shame in needing to talk to a professional to help you work through difficult feelings after the death of someone close to you. People who suffer from grief have a tendency to engage in self destructive behavior, or fail to take care of themselves, properly. It is much better that someone gets professional help, rather than fall into a dark hole.